ode to mannus tittyus

C’mon. Admit it. No matter what we might say, we readers do love a good flash of the man titty on our book covers.

So, in honour of that fact, I’ve decided to hold me a little competition where the best line completing the below will win a $5 voucher to Loose Id *It is NOT skin flinty! You can buy a Josh Lanyon for that!*:

There was a Young Man whose titty,

Graced many a cover – so pretty.

Nommy, golden and pert.

A nipple ring wouldn’t hurt!

(Your line) __________________________________________!

Some inspiration:

You have until 4pm Saturday 11 July my time to leave a comment with your line.

BTW, trash talk will see you instantly disqualified. *You know who I’m talking to!!* This is a serious competition after all.

About Kris

Reads, rants, randoms & R+s. You've been warned. BTW, don't follow me if you're a GLBTQQphobic wanker. It won't end well. For you.
This entry was posted in book covers, competition. Bookmark the permalink.

29 Responses to ode to mannus tittyus

  1. Tam says:

    If only he lived in my city.

    I just want to sing a new ditty.

    To not lick it would be such a pity.


  2. Too bad he belongs to teh kitty!

  3. Tam says:

    Ohhh, good one Emmy.

  4. Kris says:

    LOL. I can't believe I didn't see that one coming from Emmy.

    I'm also liking your #3 last line, Tam. The man titty is definitely lickable. 😉

  5. orannia says:

    The things your brain thinks of Kris 🙂

    I love Tam's licking line 🙂 My paltry suggestion:

    Oh but how do I finish this ditty?

  6. Kris says:

    If I was in any way sensitive, I really think I would get a complex from all your disparaging remarks about my mind. 😉

    How do you finish it?? I'll let you think about it and get back to me on Saturday. LOL.

  7. Jenre says:

    Tastes best smeared with Mr Whippy.

    Damn, doesn't scan.

  8. Jenre says:

    Nor would getting him all hot and sticky.

    Scans better but I'm still not entirely happy.

  9. Kris says:

    And so Jen proves that the man titty inspires an oral fixation. 🙂 LMAO.

    You have until Sat if you want to have some more goes.

  10. Tam says:

    I just hope on the beach its not gritty.

    Okay, I'm reaching here and that didn't even really make sense.

  11. Kris says:

    You iz stretching it, I think. 🙂

  12. Tam says:

    Its a shame that the story was shitty.

    Caveat: I do NOT mean the two you've posted here. Neither of these was shitty, but it rhymes. There are only so many words that rhyme with titty. Sigh. Forgive me Josh and Katrina you were victims of my lack of rhyming skills.

  13. Kris says:

    Since we're bestest mates and all, I need to tell you that you either really suck at this or your ill health is seriously affecting your mental capacity.

  14. Sean Kennedy says:

    I have nothing to say that is witty.

  15. Tam says:

    No, I just suck at it.

    Sean probably has the one I should have used. Sigh.

  16. K. Z. Snow says:

    But I won't nibble one that's all zitty.

    (YES! KZ scores for reality “ick” factor!)

    Too bad that come morning he'll quit me.

    (YES! Scores again for assonance! And more reality!)

    But two would make me quite giddy.

    (Consideration of extra points for not using a line that concluded with “clitty,” although she was tempted to.)

    Extra points for perfect scansion!

    (As Kris scribbles, Points docked for being self-congratulatory twit enamored of exlamation marks.)

    I'm just playing, though, not competing. I love limericks!


  17. K. Z. Snow says:

    In four decades, alas, they'll look shitty.

    (Oh yeah, wind me up and let me go!)

  18. Kris says:

    Sean: Are you a writer or not?! Think of something!

    Tam: Probably.

  19. Kris says:

    K Z:

    “I'm just playing, though, not competing. I love limericks!”

    No kidding!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I personally think you should have gone for clitty. LOL.

    And, yes, extra points off for all your self-praise. I'm the only one allowed to behave like that on this blog. Privileges of ownership and all that. 😉

  20. K. Z. Snow says:

    I personally think you should have gone for clitty. LOL.

    No. Trust me. I even grossed myself out with that one. (You know, there's a reason I haven't written for Ellora's Cave in a while.)

  21. Kris says:

    It IS a very nice hint at m/m/f, which EC apparently excels – in quantity not quality – at.

    I have to say tho that I'm surprised there is a reason you wouldn't write for EC other than the fact that they treat their authors like shit. You learn something new everyday.

  22. K. Z. Snow says:


    Actually, my m/m/f's are pretty good, thank you very much. I just started suffering from toxic levels of Throbbing C***s and Glistening Folds.

    The asterisks do not stand for o-c-k. I've found it's much more fun when they do…and are doubled. 😉

  23. Kris says:

    Did you not see the broad broom I was using to brush off EC?? COURSE not you, not Sam Kane, etc, etc – I was thinking about the recent bandwagoners.

    “The asterisks do not stand for o-c-k. I've found it's much more fun when they do…and are doubled. ;-)”

    Good one. LOL. I wonder how hard (get it) it would be to start an anti-throbbing clits day?

  24. K. Z. Snow says:

    “Clits” wasn't the word either, babycakes. There's one even lovelier than that.

  25. Kris says:

    Not THAT word. I fucking hate THAT word.

    Mind if I steal this topic and post about it under the heading of “tell me how the hell this can be considered sexy??”

  26. K. Z. Snow says:

    I think it would make a danged good topic.

    I've come across plenty of stuff in erotic romance that's intended to be sexy but comes across as smutty or silly or sick. (The stuff that isn't intended to be sexy doesn't count, because sometimes a world or storyline or character requires an unromantic approach to things carnal. Don't know about you, but that doesn't bother me. The justification is in the context, I guess.)

  27. Kris says:

    I agree with you that context does make all the difference.

    Cool – a post it will be. It will be interesting to get the reactions of others.

  28. Tracy says:

    lmao! omg these are all so funny. I didn't get here in time to join in but I loved reading them.

  29. Kris says:

    Tracy: I know, right.

    Okay so best line I reckon is either:

    Tam's~ To not lick it would be such a pity.


    Emmy's~ Too bad he belongs to teh kitty!

    Decisions, decisions.

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