Have any of you noticed the abundance of licking, slurping and swallowing of cum that’s happening in m/m romance at the moment?
Yeah, it’s hawt and all…
… but does it have to be in every. single. friggin’. sex. scene.
I swear to the Book Goddesses that by the end of some books I’m rolling my eyes and yelling ‘I fucking get it ok. You swallow. Let’s move on already. Jesus.’
It’s weird.
Although it would explain why some characters don’t eat at all during the story.
Kris + Books = Good. *Sometimes*. 
*snort*
No, I hadn't noticed. But I'm sure I will now. Um, thanks?
Milk and cookies anyone?
I don't mind swallowing, it's the licking it off, hands, abs, legs, you name it that kind of gags me a bit.
I'm always amazed when after two guys rub off and they are covered in cum they don't make any mention of wiping it off, they just get up and get dressed or go to sleep. Come on, that just feels gross,
Tam: It's a romantic convention that any bodily fluids disappear after the sex. Apparently being glued together by semen isn't sexy and so gets 'forgotten' about.
Actually, I quite like it when the bodily fluids are mentioned cos, you know, that's life and I like to know that my heroes are real people and not just some fantasy. So stickiness, cleaning up, dried come and the need for a shower all adds to the realism of a scene. I have to admit tho that I don't really get it when one of the heroes goes into raptures about the taste of semen. Let's face it, it doesn't taste nice, does it? We can pretend it's raspberry flavour all we like, but that would be a lie. So I'm like Tam in that I'm not too keen on them licking it off each other – swallowing is fine, rolling it about on the tongue and savouring, I can do without. Sucking it out of the other hero's arse makes me want to vomit.
Hey, Kris maybe you could do felching as one of your firsts posts.
Perhaps they are trying to keep up their daily intake of protein?
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/46/how-many-calories-are-in-the-average-male-ejaculation
Jen she already did that one!! You missed it??? That is so gross!
I did miss it! How did I manage that? I must have been really busy that day and didn't read my blog roll.
Damn. I would have had lots to say about that topic.
Chris, welcome! *beams*
Katiebabs chook, what you don't think that pic is appropriate to this topic??
Tam: BJs and swallowing go together like birds and feathers so that's all fine with me. It's the slurping, licking, etc that seems to happen all the bloody time in m/m sex scenes at the moment that drives me crazy.
Oh for the stack of washcloths by the bed. 😉
Yeah, believe me if it tasted like raspberries or chocolate (or both) everyone would swallow. LOL But it doesn't and I don't care how much pineapple a guy eats it's not going to help dramatically in my books.
Jen, well, there goes my fantasies as to whether there is a little bandanna hint to indicate whether you are raspberry flavoured or not.
I don't mind the mention of bodily fluids. It's the 'what happen next' and this thing at the moment where there are a lot of sex scenes that continue/end/start again with copious amounts of cum being slurped off chests, etc. It's boring to read it over and over again.
Oh, and as Ingrid indicated, my post on felching suitably impressed everyone.
H *snort* It's only a zip, lick and a swallow before we'll be seeing the 'semen diet' or some doofus using cum to replace egg whites. You know I'm right.
Tam, besides the vamps and blood thing, didn't a discussion about what you eat changing the flavour of your cum happen somewhere in the past year? Was it at Wave's??
Ha – that's why they don't eat.
Protein shakes..nom nom
Supposedly it does have an effect. Pineapple supposedly is good, smoking is very bad when it comes to flavour but I'm not really volunteering to do a scientific analysis.
You mean like this cookbook Kris?
http://www.lulu.com/content/4956212
The comments are most of the fun here.
Mandi, exactly! It all makes sense now, doesn't it.
Tam, LOL! I'm loving that blurb – “Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants.” Fucking hilarious.
I'm with Tam. I hate reading about it being licked off stomach, back, fingers, etc.
Swallowing during a blowjob…fine. Expected. Also pleasant.
But licking COLD, slimy cum off some other hairy body part is disgusting. GROSS. Licking one's *own* cum off something is even worse to me. Blehhhhh.
Then again, I'm not male. Boys do seem to enjoy playing with bodily fluids. O_O
Jen: “But licking COLD, slimy cum off some other hairy body part is disgusting.”
It certainly is when you describe it like that. Jesus.
I have a little throw up in my mouth.
*snort*
I'm with Tam. It's the letting it all dry and not wiping it off or showering…
H – LOL!
Okay, so what you're saying is that boys are smelly and crusty too, Orannia?? 😉
I am never have dirty, wet, cum filled sex ever again thanks to all of you!!
Are you happy now?
Are you turning lesbian KB?
Just keepin' it real, baby. 😉
Tam: I would but Jen B and Kris broke my girly heart. They continue to deny me their love and girly bits.
Guilt doesn't work on me, KB. Just fyi.
purty please with yummy cookies on top? We talk about many cookies on the twitter side. Smexy and I are such twitter ho's. Come be a part of us!
Stop trying to tempt me!
all the cool kids are on it! Emmy and Teddy are on it…
Stand strong, Kris!
Twitter and Facebook free and proud to be. 🙂
Ditto Chris. Keep hanging in there Kris!
I'm on Twitter too! KB and a bunch of others swayed me. Evil temptresses.
Hmm…this might be why I don't read m/m? Lol…bodily fluids are just icky.
Um, speaking of m/m have you read Polar Reaction by Claire Thompson (I think that's her name)? Yeah, I was going to pop my m/m cherry with that one and quite literally burned my eyes out instead. All I can say is “Yowza!”
I was just about to eat a piece of brie cheese *kicks it away* – funny you should mention swallowing…just finished reading a very delicious non m/m book, BUT I've been noticing a erotic romance trend of the swallowing kind. No one likes to swallow. This has been grilled into us since the birth of cough medicine. Every once in awhile, okay, sexy, but every frigging time! No. I said. No!
*peers at Kris* perhaps you need a change…a historical/fantasy of Miss Percy Parker change buwhahahahahah
Gee, sorry to ruin your appetite, KC. *smirk*
“Every once in awhile, okay, sexy, but every frigging time! No. I said. No!”
Right on, sister. Oh, God I've just remembered something that I have to send you.
“perhaps you need a change…a historical/fantasy of Miss Percy Parker change buwhahahahahah”
Yeah, you're so fucking funny.
Bridget, my loins are girded. I shall not succumb.
“Yeah, I was going to pop my m/m cherry with that one and quite literally burned my eyes out instead.”
Hun, you can't start with m/m/m. It will scare anyone off. You need to go for something where the most of the sex happens off page like Sean's Tigers & Devils. This was the one that I started the Mumma with so believe me when I say it's non-explicit.