things that make you go O_o

As a result of my recent glut on yaoi, something I’ve noticed which is occasionally used in the first seme/uke sex scene is the phrase ‘Don’t worry. It only hurts the first time.’


Did you know there is a male version of a hymen and, once gone, sex magically becomes more enjoyable?? *Whoa. Deja vu.*

You learn something new everyday.

About Kris

Reads, rants, randoms & R+s. You've been warned. BTW, don't follow me if you're a GLBTQQphobic wanker. It won't end well. For you.
This entry was posted in probably tmi, randomness, things that make you go O_o, tropes, WTF, yaoi. Bookmark the permalink.

26 Responses to things that make you go O_o

  1. K. Z. Snow says:



    A hymen is NOT the same thing as a tight butt that hasn't been broken in.

    That's what Castanet says, anyway.

  2. the hymen in the the ass is called the rose. You pop it and everything comes out smelling like roses!


  3. Tam says:

    So I suppose they are saying the muscle will never snap back after a good time? That's not very encouraging.

    That last yaoi I read actually showed condoms and lube on the nightstand. Creepily put there by the one kid's uncle (kid = 18). Not sure they used it but they both commented that it was kind of creepy the uncle supplied them. First time I think I've ever seen lube in yaoi that didn't = spunk/spit.

  4. Kris says:

    K Z: Ms C never ceases to amaze me with the breadth of her knowledge and experience.

    KBC: Hmmm, I've heard that when you pop a rosebud it becomes a cherry… or is that the other way around…

    Tam: Gives a whole meaning to the phrase 'loosening your bowels', doesn't it.

    Lubes and condoms in yaoi?? *gasp* No. I don't believe you.

  5. Kris: cherry becomes a rose? I am thinking poprocks now. LOL.

    I also have Mho's letter for you to see… 😀

  6. Tam says:

    “Lubes and condoms in yaoi?? *gasp* No. I don't believe you.”

    It was originally your yaoi, or did you just blank it out. It was in Maid in Heaven.

  7. Kris says:

    KBC: Fizzes in the mouth!! 😉

    I only know this, btw, because I googled it. LOL.

    “I also have Mho's letter for you to see… :D”

    Oooh, I wonder what tricky love problem has been brought to Mho this time 'round.

    Tam: *Bloody hell 35 year old onset dementia I haz it.* Now I remember. Thinking it an aberration in yaoi, I obviously had dismissed it from my memory. 😉

  8. Mumma J says:

    My oh my!

    I learn so much from reading your blog…

  9. JenB says:

    Not the same at all. Owwwww.

    Some butts need to be broken in every time. Actually, most should be. Otherwise… O.o And that muscle actually gets stronger with use; easier to relax and open, but also easier to clamp shut.

  10. K. Z. Snow says:

    This whole discussion is starting to sound like the yaoi version of enema.

    Yes, Castanet has broken many a stubborn butt. Or is it butthead? I can't remember. She tends to ramble a lot. Unlike I.

  11. K. Z. Snow says:

    Would somebody please pull these elements together for me? I'm, like, a yaoi virgin:

    a.) roses
    b.) cherries
    c.) snapping muscles
    d.) Pop Rocks
    e.) spit 'n' spunk
    f.) Mho (because I'd thought this was a character in J.R. Ward's new “Stooge Brotherhood” series)

  12. Jenre says:

    Well I'm hardly qualified to say anything here, but I did think that once the rosebud had been breached then things were easier after that.

    Perhaps this is, yet again, one of those m/m myths.

  13. Ingrid says:

    Well the one good thing about not using anything that it doesn't interrupt the action. No grabbing in (hotel) bed stands, coffee table drawers or behind couch pillows.

    They also use some sort of lube in Okane ga nai, for the record.

  14. Tam says:

    Okay, I have been thinking about pop rocks and since they need moisture to pop, if you put them elsewhere than your mouth would they pop? Perhaps it would work better with a girl? Anyone heard of this? Tried it? I'm dying to know now. Maybe I'll start a whole new pop rocks fetish on the internet.

  15. Jenre says:

    Pop rocks in your hoo ha? That would make for an interesting experience :).

  16. K. Z. Snow says:

    Holy hot damn, imagine having your own Fourth of July fireworks in your “love canal.” Maybe insert a little flag or two in your delta, shove a sparkler between your cheeks, stick on some red-white-and-blue spangled pasties…and you're ready for a parade!

    (I'm crackin' up here.)

  17. Tracy says:

    Tam I just got Maid in Heaven in the mail! Thanks. *runs to get it and check out paraphenalia on the nightstand*!

    It only hurts the first time? huh – who'da thunk.

  18. KZ Snow: The story of Mho is a long one but his influence is because of Ward.

    I am so not going there with pop rocks in the hoo haa. I just finished an erotic romance about a vampire, human and elf. The vamp and elf have sex with the human woman and get this, they are able to put both their wee-wees at the same time in her hoo haa. First time I ever read that!

  19. Tam says:

    Glad it got there Tracy.

    You need to watch more disturbing porn Katie. 🙂 I suppose if you can put two up the rear entrance, why not two in the hoo ha which stretches more? Although it seems like an unnecessary amount of work when you have two hole right there. Maybe the elf was not that large? I have an image in my head of the Keebler elves getting funky now. Arrgghh

  20. Kris says:

    Mumma: Yes, it's very edjumactional. You should approve.

    JenB: See, there is a reason for the 1-2-3. 😉 I'm not entirely certain I wanted to know that the muscle gets stronger with use, although it does explain a lot about some of the erotica I've read.

    Rambling Lady: “This whole discussion is starting to sound like the yaoi version of enema.” And THANK YOU for the images that conjured up in my little brain on an early Sunday morning with only one cup of coffee. *Dear God.*

    Let me attempt to answer you questions… *ahem*

    The Pop Rocks are something that an innocent little uke will be sucking because he likes things that explode in his mouth. Long and short story, he gets seduced by a big strapping seme who wants to pop his cherry. The seme loves the uke's little rosebud and treats it like the male version of a hymen when really it's a snapping muscle that needs preparation, but in yaoi generally only gets spit 'n' spunk. The End.

    As to Mho aka the Demon King Mho Fho, sheepucubus and love doctor extraordinaire… go here to find out more:

  21. Kris says:

    Jen: JenB, who is now our resident expert, says otherwise. Maybe the 'get used to it' thing is meant to be more along the lines of 'you now know what to expect'. *shrugs*

    Ingrid: True, although it still makes me flinch when reading some scenes.

    Tam: *snort* Maybe you need to rejig your food and sex post to now include Pop Rocks.

    I'm not sure about the internet fetish, btw, but you've certainly seemed to have, err, kick-started the imaginations of Jen, KZ and KB.

    Tracy: Apparently that was just an urban legend… kinda like Pop Rocks and Coke making your tummy explode.

  22. Kris says:

    Katiebabs chook: Tam's right. You need to read more erotica and porn, hun, because that's two-in-one is a scenario I've read a couple of times

    Having said that I haven't read it a lot since m/f romance authors discovered the joys of anal sex. 😉

    Tam: Are you and KZ deliberately trying to make my head explode this morning?? Fuck.

  23. orannia says:

    There was lube in Maid In Heaven? My memory really is shot!

  24. Kris says:

    Ha! See Tam. Orannia missed it too!

  25. JenB says:

    Well…one can certainly learn to relax one's own muscles in anticipation of–ahem–entry. But a few seconds of stretchy-stretch is courteous.

    Jeez, people. Foreplay!

    Heh…what always gets me in manga is the self-lubricating arsehole. O.o

  26. Kris says:

    Foreplay?? *ponders* Wait… I've heard of that before.

    Plz to be allowing me to edjumacate you…

    'it only hurts the first time' = the snapping of a hymen

    self-lubricating arsehole = 'oh god you're so wet for me'

    Ringing any bells?? Let me give you a hint – only one is the boy love version of het sex. 😉

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