Forget the fact that some people should never, ever be allowed to write emails because their brain fails to engage their ‘I’m being a rude, arrogant, insulting fucktard-o-meter’ before they hit send.
Forget the fact that I have to go ‘in country’ late arvo for a meeting and will likely be dodging were-kangas out on their secret Friday night run on the drive back home.
Forget the fact that I haven’t received any – well, okay kinda one – birthday packages yet.
Look. At. This.
Kris + Books = Good. *Sometimes*. 
and I thought my handwriting was bad.
You are an impatient girl. It's not your birthday yet so sit tight.
Jen has British writing. Even if I had no clue where she lived I'd know by the handwriting. Its weird, you all have the same penmanship. 😛
Menage girl: *Damn, why didn't I think of using that as an excuse to open the card. :(*
Jen might kick your arse for the criticism of her handwriting. She's already proven how mean she can be so don't be surprised if she goes on the attack!
Tam: There are only a certain number of mailman days left. Time is running out! I want my loot!!!!!!!!!!!
Mumma said exactly the same thing. She knew immediately that the card was from Jen.
Who knew that handwriting had an accent.
Take a deep breath and think VIRTUAL gifts Kris.
I think Jen is wise, very wise.
Bad girl Sissy…
Would this be the right place and time to let all of those lovely virtuals know about the mess you made of my wardrobe when you were younger (not a lot younger) and used to go searching for presents at Christmas and birthdays too?
I told you that your parcel would take 6 to 16 days to arrive – that was from early last week. You are so greedy!
Yes Tam, one can always tell the Pommy writing, obviously they didn't learn cursive writing at school! 😦 sorry Jen
Tracy: Virtual gifts?? YAY!!!!!
That almost makes up for your comment about Jen being wise.
*sigh* Mumma, you are such a bloody tattle tale.
“You are so greedy!”
Am not. *pouts*
Are too…
Am not!!
I wouldn't be able to resist if I were you. That's like FIVE days you'll have to wait! I can wait a day or two, but five! *shakes head* Jen is truly evil. 😀
*choosing to believe that I'm not being goaded*
I know! *wails* And it came on Tuesday which is even longer!!!
Jen is a meanhead.
Well, you know, if I'd known you were going to show off my handwriting to the world, I'd have made sure I wrote in my bestest, neatest handwriting.
As it was, I remembered about 15 mins before I had to do the school run that I wanted to send the package off to you and so it was all done in a bit of a rush – hence the scribble.
Besides my handwriting is 10 times better than Sean's.
Also, everyone knows that you are not allowed to open cards/pressies before the big day or you won't have anything to open ON the day, silly.
Oh, Mumma, we are taught cursive handwriting in schools but are allowed to let that develop into our own unique handwriting style :P.
Well…one family member (who shall remain anonymous) used to shake and prod and rattle the parcels to determine what was in them. So…I always try and arrange for 'stuff' to arrive as close to the day in question as possible so as to limit them…temptation days *grin*
I have to agree with Jen. You can't open your prezzies until it is your actual birthday.
You are hard to please you know? Would you have rather that it arrived after your birthday? Once you put something in the mail to downunder you have no clue when it arrives. It's no fedex you know.
Just think about how happy you'll be on your birthday, when you will still have to open all your presents 😉
Come on, “delayed gratification”… you should have read it about it a time or two 😛
Jen, it's true. Sean's handwriting is atrocious.
Did you notice it wasn't me, btw, that was taking the piss out of your handwriting. It was for another reason that I was annoyed.
Orannia: I do not shake and rattle. I poke and prod. The former could cause damage and that would be poo.
Ingrid: “Would you have rather that it arrived after your birthday?”
Yes. That way I'd get to open it straight away and then bitch about what poor planning everyone had in terms of allowing for our crappy postal service.
Sara: *light bulb goes off* Oh, I see. Why didn't anyone use a sex metaphor re: present opening happening on b'days before. I totally get where you're coming from now.
And to think I was just about to send both you and Jen something through the post. How rude.
Oh, and you should know that Jen sent me here via Twitter, saying that you were being mean. This is why you should have a Twitter account.
Now who's the stirrer!
DOGPILER!
You have some remarkably interesting slang terms in Australia, Sean. Fortunately, I have no idea what they mean so the insults just sail over my head :P.
Children, please! Do I have to separate you.
Now if you can't play nice with the social networking tool I'll have to take it away from the both of you and send you to time out.
Are we clear.
She started it.
And yes, Mum, she is the cat's mother.
Now, Sean… if she said to you that you should write menage or mpreg, would you??
No, I didn't think so.
Play nice with Elliot's Mum.
*mutters to self* Maybe I SHOULD write mpreg. That would get you all. But then you'd probably like it, you damn yaoi lovers.
*louder* Sure thing, birthday girl!
Oh please PLEASE don't encourage authors to write mpreg. It scares me. *curls up in a ball and cries*
You kids are silly, by the way. 😛
*grabs popcorn* I'm sitting down to watch Jen and Sean get in a “cat” fight.
Sean: *rolls eyes* Subtle, Sean. Real subtle.
JenB: That's because you keep imagining Arnie in the leading role. Think a cute little cross dressing twink. See. Doesn't that hurt less. 😉
Tracy: It fizzled out. How disappointing.
It fizzled out cos one of us made a dignified retreat by going away for the weekend ;).
Yeah, that Sean can be so undignified.