maybe it’s me, but…

Posted on 14/01/2012 by Kris



I’ve always been a reader who has moments when they fantasise about Teh Big Bookity Dream To End All Dreams.


For me, there are two:


To have the kind of personal library that would be the envy of all my reading friends with shelves from floor to ceiling and rolling ladders ala the library in Disney’s Beauty and the Beast.  *dreamy sigh*


and


To have one of those old fashioned book stores.  You know, the kind that’s warm and welcoming with hidden reading nooks which invite you to snuggle in, take a deep breath and enjoy losing yourself in the story.  Unfortunately, you don’t see a lot of these anymore.  I so miss them.


So, are you a reader who’s ever had these kind of dreams? I’d love to know what they are. 🙂

Posted in awesomeness, book stores, books, dreams of a reader, libraries, maybe it's me but, me | 21 Comments

things that make you go O.o

Posted on 12/01/2012 by Kris




I don’t even have the words to express how wrong I think this is.


I’m going to have nightmares tonight.


I know it. 

Posted in book series, me, OCD, reading, things that make you go O_o, WTF | 13 Comments

bookity mehs: part 3

Posted on 10/01/2012 by Kris



I have Teh Awesomesauce.


Last night I read.


READ!

*mutterfuckingfinallymutter*
Posted in awesomeness, maybe it's me but, me, reading | 9 Comments

bookity mehs: part 2

Posted on 08/01/2012 by Kris

As part of this online community, you’ve probably seen a gazillion posts asking you what you do when you’re in the reading doldrums.  

In fact, I’m pretty sure I’ve done one myself, which I would totally revisit if I could be bothered.  

Laziness = Kris.

Anyhoo, my usual method of dealing with the bookity mehs is to glom TV series until I get bored shitless with them and am in desperate need of a reading fix.

At the moment, though, I seem to have had enough of a series about the end-of-seasonish.  This finds me starting a whole new series with one or two episodes left to go in the last… and then I stop and start another… and then another… well, you get the picture.  

Teh Toy Poodle Flu.  I haz it.

On other occasions, I’m able to kill the slumpity dead by rereading stuff which appeals to my mood at the time.

Unfortunately, this has pretty much been happening when insomnia strikes so I’m usually going straight to books that bore the complete and utter crap out of me in an attempt to try and get back to snoozing.  

Hey, whatever works, right.

One thing I’ve come to realise over this past week is that, when I do turn to books, it’s not so much as a reread as it is a skim-job.


And not so much a skim as it is a flick to the sex scenes.


Yeah.  


Further proof I’m a perve.


Like there was any doubt. 


Does anyone else do that?  Reread sex scenes, that is.  C’mon, fess up.  You know you want to. 😉

Posted in maybe it's me but, me, reading | 20 Comments

bookity mehs: part 1

Posted on 05/01/2012 by Kris



As I’ve mentioned a couple of times, I had the reading slumpity to end all slumpities in 2011.


Out of curiousity, I looked my goodreads shelves to see what the difference was between the number of books I’d read in 2011 to those in 2010.


It shocked the hell out of me.  


I mean, I knew the severity of my mental illness caused me to have a lack of interest in all the things I usually love/d doing, especially reading, but I just hadn’t realised the full extent of it.


So, in 2011, I read 155 books and, in 2010, I read 450.


Yeah.  That’s quite a slump I had – and still have – going.


What about others?  Have you found yourself reading more or less in the last couple of years and why?

Posted in maybe it's me but, me, reading | 13 Comments

random awesomeness

Posted on 04/01/2012 by Kris

Why not start 2012 as I mean to go on – like I’ve really changed that much – with some book-related snark.



You’re welcome.

Posted in awesomeness, extra further randomness, reading, serious randomness | 10 Comments

thank you: the wrap-up to end all end-of-year bandwagon wrap-ups

Posted on 31/12/2011 by Kris



I was going to write something profoundly witty to mark the occasion of the last day of 2011.  You know, just my usual brand of awesome. 


However, when reflecting about the past year, there is only one thing which has dominated my life as well as those of the people around me and that has been, and still is, my mental illness.


Without a doubt this has been one of the toughest years I’ve ever had.  


God, geezus, has it ever been. 


When I wrote the other day about my main achievement having been surviving 2011, it was no exaggeration.  


There were so many times when I didn’t think I would make it, when the thoughts about ending the overwhelming and suffocating pain of depression consumed me, when all I could think about was escape.


I recently read one of those tumblr quotes/notes which said ‘Depression takes away the one thing you thought could never be taken away – yourself’.


On top of everything else – the depression, the anxiety disorder, the obsessive compulsive disorder, the diagnosis of bipolar and the bad behaviours associated with these illnesses such as my self-medication with booze and my self-harming – one of the biggest things I’ve had to struggle to deal with is my sense of loss of self.  


That I’m not the person who I thought I was.  


I know I am, if now somewhat changed, but feeling I am is something quite different and is a battle I continue to fight daily.


Which leads me to one of the most significant things I’ve experienced this year – the love, friendship and unconditional support of my family and my online friends.

If not for them, I couldn’t have got through 2011.


If not for your wishes, hope and belief in me, I don’t believe I would still be here.  


It’s really as simple as that.


There are so many who’ve helped me get through this year; whether it be by leaving a comment, by tweeting me, by sending me an email, by mailing me a card or a present. 


While I can’t name you all – which I’m totally blaming on my new memory-killing meds – there are a number of people who immediately spring to mind as they’ll never know how many times their reaching out to me happened when I was at my lowest.  


The times when I was corresponding with them while my entire body was shaking, barely seeing the keyboard because of my uncontrollable sobbing, and with only the words I was typing to them stopping me from focussing on knives and blood.


To Tam, Chris, Sean, Juni, Emilie, Tiffany, Tish, Orannia, Tracy, Jen, Kaetrin and Eyre as well as to those who’ve come more recently into my life like Stephani, Amara and Nic – I thank you.


There are no other words profound enough to express how deeply I appreciate you all and am so very grateful for having you – and all the rest of my minions ❤ – in my life.


The life you’ve helped me fight for.


And now I’m all snotty and sappy.


Bitches.

Posted in best of 2011, best ofs, me | 22 Comments

end-of-year bandwagon wrap-ups #6

Posted on 27/12/2011 by Kris



As a lot of you know, I haven’t been reading a whole heap this year – one of the fall-outs of not being in the greatest of mental health.


Stupid brain.


Despite this, I did get in a couple of reads in 2011.  Some of which were even worthy of my time.  😛


One of these was the subject of much pimpage; not only to me, but to what I’m sure was at least half of the m/m community.


Oh, yeah.  She was that bad.


*ponders* Maybe she has become a super top seekrit marketing agent for m/m authors??


Naw.  I’m sure she would have blabbed about that already.  ;P


Where was I??


Right.


The subject of the pimpage was Knight Errant by K. D. Sarge.  The book pimp… seriously, you actually need me to tell you?  Surely, you remember getting that email from her?  And I thought my mind was a sieve.  It was Chris…


I could actually see the virtual light bulb switch on then.


Heh.


She’s just lucky that Knight Errant lived up to her ravings or there would have been much blood shed… and not all of it by me.


Did anyone sucker you in this year?  If so, what were the best and worst – naturally – of the books pimped to you in 2011?

Posted in best of 2011, best ofs, book pimpage, chris, k d sarge, reading, serious randomness, serious shit | 24 Comments

merry krismas!

Posted on 24/12/2011 by Kris



Dear Minions and Random Others,


The Doctor and I would like to wish you all a safe, healthy and happy Krismas.


Be excellent to each other.


Yours in love and friendship,


Me xxx


PS – Fingers crossed that I’m getting K-9 for xmas. x

Posted in me | 13 Comments

end-of-year bandwagon wrap-ups #5

Posted on 22/12/2011 by Kris



Swag.  


The idea of getting goodies from your fave authors brings out the squee in the majority of readers.


Anyone who says otherwise is lying.  Just sayin’.


However, after that initial burst of giddiness, a number of us realise we are stuck with a whole heap of useless shit which will end up going to swag heaven.


Anyone who says otherwise is lying.  Just sayin’.


There also appears to be an echo in here.


Heh.


So what is it that ends up making it to the final round of ‘stuff I’ll make room for in my luggage’??


For me it’s two things… pens and post-its.


Pens because you can never have enough of those bloody things, especially when you have a habit of breaking them.  *mutterfuckersmutter*


My go-to swag pen is a T. C. Blue one.  For some reason it always comes to my hand whenever I reach in the drawer for a pen.  


*whispers* I think it might be possessed.


Post-its because I have an obsession.  It is true. I have a deep abiding love for which there is no cure.  I would marry post-its if I could.  Kid you not.


The extent of my post-it lust??  Well, after everyone had left the GRL goodbye breakfast, I may have gone around all the tables taking the post-it pads given out by Resplendence Publishing.


Or it could have been another freckle-faced Aussie…


*cough*


Are you a fan of swag?  If so, what was your fave goodie in 2011?

Posted in authors, best of 2011, best ofs, extra further randomness, serious randomness | 31 Comments